Mindset, Community, and the Next Big Trend w/ Rachel Hechtman
Welcome to Journey to the Sunnyside, the podcast where we have thoughtful conversations to explore the science of habits, uncover the secrets to mindful living, and of course, your own mindful drinking journey. This podcast is brought to you by Sunnyside, the number one alcohol moderation platform. And if you could benefit from drinking a bit less, head on over to sunnyside.co to get a free fifteen day trial. I'm your host, Mike Hardinbrook, published author, neuroscience enthusiast and habit change expert. Today I'm talking with Rachel Heckman, the founder of Sober in Central Park and an active figure in the non alcohol community in New York City.
Speaker 1:She's also involved with a project called Soft Bar alongside Carl Radke from Bravo TV's Summer House. Rachel made a bold decision to embrace sobriety and build a community that supports anyone looking to change their relationship with alcohol. And in this episode, we'll explore why she built sober in Central Park, the role of mindset in community and why she thinks those are essential to change and what you can learn from her journey, whether you're exploring sobriety or mindful drinking. All right, today I'm here with Rachel Heckman,
Speaker 2:and we are going to be discussing a few points, but she's involved with some really exciting things around the alcohol free and sober events space. She's created some amazing groups. She's involved with sort of these alcohol free bars and this trend that's really starting to emerge. We're going to get into why this is happening. What are the benefits to that?
Speaker 2:But before we jump in first, let me say, Rachel, thanks for coming on.
Speaker 3:Thanks so much for having me.
Speaker 2:Definitely. I'm excited to get into this because it's a unique angle that we'll get into today. But I think everybody, and it's important to know, has an origin story. And so to understand where you're coming from, where your point of view is, why don't you talk a little bit about your origin story about your drinking, where that led you to and where you are now today.
Speaker 3:Sure. So I'm gonna give you the condensed abbreviated version, or we could be here literally all day. But essentially, I was the party girl for a very, very long time. Know, I started drinking when I was 14 years old. I saw it as an escape from reality.
Speaker 3:I saw it as a a solution to a lot of my problems and my emotions, a way to numb, and all the cool kids did it. So I wanted to be cool. I wanted to fit in. I, you know, quickly found myself in the fast group, as they say. And, you know, I for a long time, I really did think it was cool.
Speaker 3:And I eventually started not doing well in school. It was like tenth grade. And my mom sent me to boarding school where I repeated my sophomore year and got diagnosed with ADHD, which was a huge blessing and a huge part of my story. And I got put on medication for my ADHD. And for a while, it seemed like everything kind of was fixed.
Speaker 3:And this was like a big, you know, oh, I have ADHD. We didn't know. This is why I had so many issues. I ended up getting into my first choice college and going to Dartmouth in New Hampshire, which I had absolutely no idea that that was gonna be like a huge drinking party school, which most colleges are. I totally get that.
Speaker 3:But this was just on another level. There's not much to do up there except hang out in frat basements. And I, you know, went from being in a very structured environment where people were always watching me to being in college where I could just do whatever I wanted. And I went crazy. I just partied as much as I could.
Speaker 3:I did not care about school, really. I it took me forever to graduate. And being in that environment really normalized my substance use problems. And for a while, it wasn't alcohol was always an issue. But it was other things that I was doing too, that I think people were concerned about, including myself.
Speaker 3:I mean, I wasn't concerned, but I think other people were concerned for me. And, you know, be when you surround yourself with other people doing these things, it allows you to normalize the behavior. Right? And so that to me, was like, oh, everybody just like drinks until they throw up and then keeps drinking again. Like, that's normal.
Speaker 3:It's not normal. And it's really that's insane. So I, you know, I left school and I got back to New York City and, you know, was kind of lost for a while for a long time. You know, I got a job, it was a high stress job. And every night we would, you know, go out for happy hour, drink till we were like blackout and wake up and repeat.
Speaker 3:And that cycle persisted for a really long time. And I, you know, would just surround myself here in the city with other people that had the same drinking habits, other people that had the same substance habits. So I didn't feel like it was me that was a problem. And then fast forward, you know, to I'm like out of my twenties, I stopped the other substances I was doing and was really just like drinking because that's what's socially acceptable, alcohol. And it's pushed on us everywhere we go.
Speaker 3:And, you know, that was what I used to cope with a lot of my feelings and emotions and uncomfortable feelings, right, that we all that we all have. And I found myself in a relationship that I knew wasn't right, but I just didn't have the confidence or the ability to kind of get out of. And I found myself living this life that I didn't like. I didn't like my job. I didn't like my partner.
Speaker 3:I didn't like my hobbies. I didn't like the way I looked. I didn't like the way I felt. And I blamed it on all these external factors like my job or money or all of these things. Right?
Speaker 3:And then when COVID happened, it kind of took away all those external factors that I was blaming for all of these things. And I found myself not having anything to to blame for all of my issues except for myself and alcohol. And that was like an uncomfortable truth I had to face. You know, it was a very slow, gradual truth. And I had this like moment of clarity at one point during COVID where I was, you know, like drinking by myself in my mom's lake, and with my dog and a guy goes running by the house and he's like on his morning run and I'm like, what a loser running on such a nice day.
Speaker 3:And this like voice in my head was like, he's not the loser, you're the loser. And I had this like internal fight with this like voice that I now think is my higher self or maybe me retelling the story, like time traveling back there. And I realized I had to stop drinking. But it took me six more months to really work up the courage to do that. And so it was like dry January of twenty twenty one.
Speaker 3:And I didn't start till the third of the month. And I didn't even think I'd make it thirty days, but but I did. And I haven't had a drink since. And my whole my whole reality has completely transformed beyond my wildest dreams. And so now I have dedicated my my time in life to just kinda spreading the message that, you know, it's possible to transform your life and to change and you don't need alcohol to have fun.
Speaker 3:That was a lie I used to tell myself a lot. So that's like, those are the clip notes.
Speaker 2:No, I love that story. And I mean, I love the ending, of course, because we're sitting here talking. But part of that story that I really identify with is the growing up the identification with something that you attach to what's around drinking. So like, for me, I was like, I want to be the you very much gave the woman version of what I did. Like, I was the party guy in high school, I went to college, and I went to University of Arizona, which also very big party school and fraternity school, and came out kind of wanting to keep that identity that I formed around being the party guy, being the fun guy that's always going out, that's outgoing, for some reason, you know, well, there's a reason because society allows us to attach ourselves and our identity to that.
Speaker 2:And I remember in high school, pretending or thinking about like fast times at Ridgemont High and Spicoli getting out of the van with the cloud of smoke. Was like, I want to be like that. Like, identities are so ridiculous. And the reason I'm mentioning this is because a big part of what we're going to talk about today is mindset. And I think identity ties really well into that.
Speaker 2:And did you at that moment, when you were sitting there and the guy went running by, did you start to kind of question your identity?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I did. Well, I started to ask myself, how do I become somebody that wants to wake up in the morning and better themselves and go on a long run versus somebody that wants to get up and drink until they don't know why they're drinking. And I was like, how do I get there? That's where it was the first time I actually questioned how do I change my identity. And I think that guy, for some reason, sparked this for me.
Speaker 3:And I, like, had an out of body experience where I, like, I can, like, see myself floating in this lake with, my big beverage by myself. And, yeah, I mean, it was it you know? But I needed I think I knew deep down for I knew for years that I needed to stop drinking. Right? It wasn't like one like, that was the time where I was like, oh, I have a drinking problem.
Speaker 3:Like, I had said out loud to people, friends of mine, after incidents usually had happened. I know I have a problem with alcohol, and I need to stop. I'm just not ready yet.
Speaker 2:Yeah, as you're thinking through that, and you're saying, you know, I think I have a problem. I need to stop. A lot of people here are either, you know, they don't drink or don't want to drink or they want to cut back or some version of that. Maybe it starts out as cutting back and they decide, you know what, that's not for me. Or maybe they stop for a while and decide, you know, I think I can reintroduce maybe in a more mindful way.
Speaker 2:What was the thought process? Did you ever at one time think, Hey, you know, maybe I can go back to being quote unquote normal?
Speaker 3:No, I'm not normal. I, you know, I'm ADHD and, you know, my brain doesn't work like that. My brain does not have a medium dial, as I like to say. Like, I am so all or nothing. And that's also why I can't drink.
Speaker 3:And I can you know, anything that gives me a dopamine release, I can become addicted to very easily. And I know this about myself now. I think I knew this about myself before, but it was already too late. Like, I was already in the thick of it. And I think, you know, when I that that version of me is just gone.
Speaker 3:Like, she doesn't exist anymore, and I never wanna even go remotely back to what it was like then. And I'm super happy in this reality where alcohol doesn't have any part or any, you know, significance in my life anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, what I'm hearing is you had a lot of self awareness early on, which is really fortunate because it got you exactly where you wanted to be. A lot of times, I think we find that we want to give ourselves the easy answer that we're looking for, even if deep down we don't know that that's what we need, or maybe just want to find the easier route to it. So I love the self awareness around that. So let's talk about what was this shift in mindset. You think that mindset and community are super important.
Speaker 2:We're going to get a community in the way that that ties into the work that you're doing, which is really exciting, by the way. Thanks for listening. And I am a true believer that engaging with our listeners is the best way for us to have an incredible show. So if you have some feedback, if you have a guest that you think that would be amazing, or maybe you have your own story that you'd like to share, please email me at mikeSunnyside dot co. I'd love to hear from you.
Speaker 2:Talk soon. Let's start with mindset though. What was the positive mindset that or the needed mindset change that you experienced that you think that others should adopt?
Speaker 3:Well, before I even stopped drinking, I've I've had the same therapist now for like eight years. Okay. Actually just had therapy before this call. So love her. And before I stopped drinking, it was during COVID.
Speaker 3:And she said to me, I want you to start saying affirmations to yourself in the mirror. And I said, no, I'm not doing that. She's like, can you just try? Just please try. So I remember going and looking in the mirror and starting to say affirmations and like tears streaming down my face.
Speaker 3:Like, I because I didn't like myself. Right? I didn't everything I was trying to say about myself, I just didn't believe. And so I would try. And I remember telling her, like, I cried.
Speaker 3:I did it, but I was crying. She's like, keeps I want you to keep saying it. I want you to keep going. And so I kept trying to say these affirmations to myself in the mirror every day. And the longer I said them, the more I started to believe them.
Speaker 3:And even things like you're strong, you're powerful, you're capable. Right? And that confidence that I built up a little bit each day from the affirmations got me to the point in January where I was like, you know what? Maybe I can try to go thirty days without drinking. I am strong.
Speaker 3:I am capable. I can do this. Right? And so a lot of times, I think we tell ourselves limiting beliefs about what we can't do, what we are not what's not possible. And so then it's not gonna happen.
Speaker 3:But in when we flip that narrative, and we actually believe that we can achieve almost anything we want in this life with the right mindset, as like those cheesy posters we used to see in school, like they're true. And manifestation's real. Like, we are super powerful beings. Yeah. And so, you know, we just have to if you don't believe it, it's not gonna work.
Speaker 3:So it was just like gradual shift of knowing that I can do what I wanna do. I can change my life. I can transform my reality. And, you know, but believing it is the first step.
Speaker 2:100%. I love that everything you said, I just connect with so much. And I'll even spin on it because I hear it so often, like mindset and changing the narrative in your mind, like, you know, what you're telling yourself every day is like so impactful. Like, Also, another thing that people say, I can't do something. Sorry, listeners, if you've heard me say this before, saying that you can't do something really creates resistance and attract what you resist persists.
Speaker 2:And then if you say like, look at all the things that I'm going to gain by doing this, like, it makes it so much more easy. And also saying, this is going to be hard. Like this weekend is a holiday weekend. It's going to be tough. It's going to be hard.
Speaker 2:Why? It doesn't have to be, but if you tell yourself it's going to be hard, it'll definitely be harder than if you tell yourself it's going to be easy. So I love what you're saying there.
Speaker 3:Someone recently said to me, you know, spelling, you know, say words or you spell out words. Well, you're literally casting a spell when you say something. Right? So there are so many, I think, little hidden things. So it's like when you say I can't, yeah, okay, you can't.
Speaker 3:You say, yeah, you can, you can. I mean, it's as simple as that. So I think the way we talk to ourselves is the number one thing that anybody should tackle on any journey, you know?
Speaker 2:For sure. Is. It's the starting point. It definitely is. Because otherwise, you're just really leaning on willpower.
Speaker 2:And if your self talk is on willpower, and it's negative, just gonna sooner or later, it's gonna give away. We're at this point in your journey that you're, you've made this commitment, you're getting some wins, you're feeling better, you've done some amazing things. I wish we had more time to talk. Like, you you lost a hundred pounds. Correct?
Speaker 3:Yeah. I mean, I will say, like, I it was from the worst part of in COVID, right, where I was out of the city, moving my body, like, you know, definitely got let myself just do whatever I wanted and it wasn't good. And, yeah, it took like a year. I would say maybe eight, nine months. It happened really fast though.
Speaker 3:I I mean, I'm so old or nothing that when I stopped drinking, I was like, I'm gonna sign up for Weight Watchers on the same day because I'm not gonna drink my points now. So maybe it will actually work. And I started walking, like, 10 miles a day just because I was so bored and I had nothing to do. And I live in New York City. And every time I wanted to drink, I would just, like, put my shoes on and take my dog outside and we'd walk.
Speaker 3:But then, you know, the momentum started coming. And I started seeing physical changes in the mirror as I felt internal changes, and it just made me wanna keep going and going. And then I started feeling more like me again, even though I didn't even know what that was since I'd been drinking for like twenty years. Like, you know, and it just like compounded on itself. And I created this like, whole new identity.
Speaker 2:Was It's so awesome. I mean, some people will say like, if you're gonna make a big change, going sober or some other feat, like don't take on too much at once, but I'm not a doctor to profess like I'm giving advice, but I know for me, like I got to replace it with something else. And all the research I said, so it sounds like you filled that time with things that were building your confidence. You also filled that time, which otherwise would be boring, which we got to figure out how to deal with times of boredom and filling it with activities and new dedications definitely helped. So you're getting these wins, you're making these huge progress in your life.
Speaker 2:I know you like spiritually and career wise, like you're just going up. Everything is going great. So tell me about Sober in Central Park. How did this idea come about and what's it all about?
Speaker 3:Yeah. Well, just quickly, I will say the I like there's a saying that's like, if you don't change radically change everything when you're stop when you quit drinking, you're gonna find yourself back in the same situations that led you to drink in the first place. And, you know, that is something I really agree with.
Speaker 2:My bad.
Speaker 3:It was COVID. It was COVID, and I didn't actually think I was getting sober. I just thought I was doing a thirty day challenge. So I didn't find myself in any meetings or with any support groups. Kind of was just like, white knuckling it.
Speaker 3:And after thirty days, I was like, I'll just see how long I can go.
Speaker 2:I have to jump in and say, I share a similar story. So you're speaking to the choir. I was like, I'm just going to do 30. They're usually really hard. And then I did 60 and I was like, why not do 90?
Speaker 2:I'm feeling pretty good. And then it was like, all of a sudden, I mean, here I am on a microphone. Here you are with silver in Central Park. It's kinda crazy how little experiments can lead to big things.
Speaker 3:Totally. Totally. I mean, I yes. And I think because I didn't think of it in forever terms, and I didn't have myself, like, I'm never drinking again. Like, I'd never told myself that I was able to be successful, you know?
Speaker 3:But So I got to, like, eight and a half months sober. And I at this point, my relationship, my ex had moved out. So I was on my own. And I had had an I got a new job that I loved and was valued, and it was super, like, the healthiest job I've ever had. And I was felt good, and I was proud of myself.
Speaker 3:And but I felt I was alone. Like, I had gotten rid of the majority of my friends and relationships from the past. And, you know, COVID helped with a lot of that though, because a lot of people moved and things everything changed. Right? But I found myself just feeling lonely and like I didn't have any community or anybody that I could talk to about all of these changes I was experiencing.
Speaker 3:And like I remember I sent a friend of mine a meme that was about like actually feeling your emotions and not using alcohol as a way to cope. And they got really offended. And they were like, they they, like, hated the meme, and they, yelled at me. And I was like, oh, it's just a meme. So that's when I was like, I need to find people on the internet that understand me.
Speaker 3:And I had an Instagram account then, but I felt weird posting like alcohol free and sober content on there because I had glamorized alcohol on there for so long, posting pictures of martinis, me drinking, like that was like what my page had been. So I felt like that version of me had kind of died. And I was still in the middle of this like rebirth. And I didn't know what new me was gonna be like, but it was like, I knew I didn't identify with my old page. So I was literally in Central Park walking every single day, like an insane amount.
Speaker 3:And I've been I had all these friends in the park. And I was like, I'm just gonna make a new Instagram. And I was like, I'm literally sober in Central Park. And that's what I'm gonna call it because I can also post pictures of the park. I don't know if I wanna show my face.
Speaker 3:Like, let's just go with that. And that's how sober in Central Park was created. And I never in a million years thought, if you're sitting on a microphone talking about it with anybody, I mean, that was the last thing I thought. There there weren't a lot of sober Instagram accounts then. It was like fall of twenty twenty one.
Speaker 3:There were really a handful, but not a lot.
Speaker 2:No, that's awesome. I love it. So you guys do some meetups. Is that what you generally do in Central Park?
Speaker 3:Well, no, not as I've done summons. I it there's been a lot of evolution of the page. Uh-huh. You know, for the first few months, I was just sharing my journey as a way to hold myself accountable. Like, knew I didn't want to drink, and I needed some public accountability.
Speaker 3:So that's kind of like what I was looking for in the page. I also wanted to connect with people. And I did connect with people pretty quickly. Other women sharing their journeys out there across the country. I had got this really close group of friends pretty quickly online.
Speaker 3:And they're they're still my friends. I mean, we've formed these deep bonds that totally got me through that first year. And, you know, they really inspired me to start doing meetups and events. And there there weren't places for people to socialize. There weren't back then, I think there was one sober bar that came around in, March 2021, maybe.
Speaker 3:But there weren't anything for people to do who didn't drink. So I wanted to kind of create spaces and foster community in person for people to come together and meet meet like minded people. But but, yeah, I did events in my old life, like my old career. Like, I was an events person, so it wasn't like crazy for me to think that I could do this. But, yeah, I mean, I wanted to try to like incorporate alcohol free living and alcohol free beverages into as much of New York City life as I could.
Speaker 2:What do you think the is I love all that. What do you think and this just came to mind is like the unifying aspect? Is it do you think it's just being able to be you without having to say why?
Speaker 3:You mean of people coming together and making friends and
Speaker 2:Yeah, in like that are centered around alcohol free. Like, do you think like, you know, the people that would follow the Instagram account or interact and it's like, they get me. So I don't have to be like, well, what do you mean you don't drink? Or what do you mean, you know, this and that?
Speaker 3:I think it's just people who are more mindful in terms of consumption, in terms of health and wellness, and it's just a different lifestyle. I don't necessarily even think it has to be like a sober versus non sober. I think it's like a lifestyle mindset of mindfulness in general and on everything you do. Yeah. Right?
Speaker 3:Like what you watch on TV, not I mean, I still don't get me wrong. I still watch reality TV and and love it. Right? But like, I used to spend a lot of time binge watching TV almost as a form of, like, of of, like, drinking. Right?
Speaker 3:Like, trying to numb. And that's not what I maybe I'll have, like, watch one episode here and two episodes there. Right? But I think it's just being mindful about everything we're consuming.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Well, speaking of TV and TV stars, you're involved on a really cool project in that regard. So tell us about soft bar.
Speaker 3:So yeah, Softbar is incredible. And I still pinch myself that this is my reality and that this project is happening. The Softbar is going to be hopefully opening in Brooklyn in 2025, like in January, we're aiming for. And it's just gonna be a new third space that is all about mindful consumption and intentional living. And we're going to have tons of different functional beverages from coffee, tea, you know, elevated cocktails where people can go, whether you drink or not, and you can have an elevated experience and have fun and meet cool people and socialize.
Speaker 3:And, you know, we really believe that just because you don't drink doesn't mean you can't have this elegant, elevated time when you're out. So I'm actually heading the events and partnerships for soft bar. And it's just been a total whirlwind in the best way.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, it's so exciting. I think it's awesome. And I think it's actually an indication of a trend and New York City is a great, place for a lot of these to start going out into the world. And then they spread from there when they catch popularity. And I would definitely be interested, like if there was one down the road.
Speaker 2:But I'm going to ask, even though I have my own answers to these, but I'm going to ask because I have friends that ask me, like, they'd say, well, why, why would I go to an alcohol free bar, even if I don't plan on drinking that night? Why wouldn't I want to maybe include some friends that do drink or, you know, like, what's the difference between that and just going to a bar that has like a mocktail recipe and that kind of thing?
Speaker 3:And I totally get that. I think, well, think about all the bars that exist, right? There are the Irish bars. There are the dive bars. There are the elegant, classy, high end cocktail bars.
Speaker 3:There's so many different kinds. Right? And they're all dedicated spaces for what you want, like, for that specific thing. Something like soft bar is going to be just another dedicated space. Right?
Speaker 3:And we're not trying to attract sober people. It's not just sober people. It's for anybody that wants to just have a night that's more mindful and inclusive. And, you know, I think it's it's hard for some people to wrap their heads around because this is all we've had for the past forever, are bars filled with alcohol, or that's what people do for fun. But there's education that we wanna put on.
Speaker 3:There's specific programming. There's so many events that I plan to have at at Softbar. Right? And you don't you don't need alcohol to have fun. And I think until you can experience that, it's hard to understand.
Speaker 3:So hopefully all those people can come to soft bar and then they'll see what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I mean, you're speaking my language. I mean, my answers to them was kind of like, well, maybe you're not drinking alcohol and you want to go and be in a nice atmosphere that has a lot more options.
Speaker 1:Or maybe you don't want
Speaker 2:to listen to maybe the guy that had a little too many at the end of the bar that's been a little too loud, or like, you know, just so many different things, or it's just something different. You know, every other bar can just add a few mocktails or they're usually pretty lame, to be honest, probably not in New York, but definitely in more places that, you know, it hasn't caught on quite as much. So I think it's exciting actually. So I'm curious to know, so it's alcohol free. Are there plans for any other kind of substances, or is it just going to be completely, you know, clean and clear of any of that kind of stuff?
Speaker 3:I can't speak a % on that. Like I, you know, there's still a lot of decisions being made. I can tell you that at pop ups we've had so far, we've included Kava in our offerings, which some people, it's a divisive topic to some people in the sober community. I personally like kava and don't see a problem with it. But I also understand that some people do have a problem with it.
Speaker 3:And I think plant medicine to some people is plant medicine, and some people can't have that. So it's a very personal journey. We are an alcohol free bar. We have not made decisions % on our offerings. But I expect, you know, we will probably have kava at the very least on our on our menus.
Speaker 3:And, you know, everyone's different.
Speaker 2:I love that. I mean, I have I've said it before, I think that in the future, and I don't know how far into the future, but I actually don't think that far is that you go to a bar and the legalities of a lot of these things that are kind of up for FDA approval or disapproval at some point, will probably be something that you can put together yourself on demand at a bar and alcohol front and center will probably, maybe will be there, but definitely won't be the only and go to option.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean, definitely. There's a lot of stuff that is way healthier for you, way better for you that has been illegal, right? Alcohol is way worse. So it's kind of mind boggling to think about how some of these decisions were made, but, you know, there's a lot of beverages coming out right now that have all different kinds of plants in them and, you know, adaptogens and and these plants are powerful. You know?
Speaker 3:Actually, a soft bar's tagline is drinks with benefits. Right? So we've really focused on adaptogenic drinks and the functionality of beverages because people don't really want just like a Shirley Temple and a soda and, you know, here you go. People wanna feel something, whether that's uplifting benefits or calming benefits or focused benefits. Right?
Speaker 3:We actually have a doctor of clinical nutrition advising us on our functional ingredients. She's a close friend of mine as well, Doctor. Brooke Scheller.
Speaker 2:She's amazing. I love her.
Speaker 3:She's a yeah. Love her. And so yeah, I mean, you know, we're really we have experts in all of these things, you know, trying to create the most elevated, inclusive experience possible.
Speaker 2:Yeah. You know, what I also thought about is for a lot of the people here that are, you know, drinking mindfully, and certain days, they're not going to drink, but maybe they want to go out and maybe they don't want to see it in front of them. So you go to this bar one day, and you go to another bar the other day, I mean, it certainly would be switching it up and making it fun. When we're talking about these spaces that you're creating, I think that ties in great obviously to communities. So how did you find community to be really integral to where you are today and to your recovery?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean, community is everything. I don't know if sober in Central Park wouldn't have survived without community. You know, I kind of created this community of people that lifted me up when I needed a boost, that held me accountable, you know, that questioned and challenged and became my friends. You know, almost all like, going back to Doctor. Brooke Scheller, right?
Speaker 3:Like, we met through, actually, we actually met in person at a brunch, but we met because we have someone we met on Instagram that invited us to a brunch. And She's Right?
Speaker 2:Is
Speaker 3:Well, she's in LA now, and I'm actually going to visit her in two weeks. But it's, you know, I have all of these friends now that are kind of through Instagram, but also, you know, just because of this community that I found. And, you know, there's always gonna be ups and downs and bad days no matter what you're doing. Right? But when you have this community to fall back on and to lift you up when you need it, I mean, that's that's how we get through the hard times and the downs.
Speaker 3:Right? And then you can be there for someone else when they need it. So social media was definitely my community.
Speaker 2:Do you think that these communities are, and even places like soft bar, are gonna become more mainstream, more accessible? You know, do you feel like maybe you're at ground zero with what you're working on right now?
Speaker 3:Yeah, definitely. So there's a lot of data out there that I think it's between eighty five and ninety five percent of people who buy non alcoholic beverages still drink. So that's just the data that we have. And we all know too, like every news article that comes out, Gen Z is drinking significantly less than any other generation ever before. So people still wanna socialize.
Speaker 3:They still wanna go out. They still wanna, you know, be out of their houses, and there's gonna have to be another solution to that. And I think that's what we're providing. Right? We're creating a there's a hole right now in the market in terms of where do you go?
Speaker 3:What do you do if you don't wanna drink? And then not only are we gonna create this, like, new option, but and it's not just like you go there if you don't wanna drink for a night. It's like the drinks are gonna be good for you. You're gonna be healthy. They're gonna do something positive to the body, whether it's with vitamin b three or b twelve, rodeo, ashwagandha, lions.
Speaker 3:I mean, like, there's so many cool things now that you can do to help yourself. And so it's just, you know, all about being mindful.
Speaker 2:Yeah. You named a little bit of my concoctions that I make for myself in the morning there. It's like getting a little ridiculous, but I love them all. And usually it keeps me thinking clear, especially on the days that are difficult. You know, so I'm interested to ask you, and this is just off the cuff, but, you know, alcohol companies realize that this trend is going down.
Speaker 2:They also see that by not because of any kind of moral obligation that they got to get into the alcohol free space. So in doing this public thing that you guys are doing, are you noticing is anybody approaching you to be like, want to kind of latch themselves onto you or see what the opportunities are?
Speaker 3:I mean, I think big alcohol is scared, but they're also pivoting quickly and creating non alk options. Right? So a lot of these big alcohol brands are creating like White Claw has White Claw Zero. Right? Heineken Zero.
Speaker 3:All of these brands are realizing like, that's where a lot of the money is right now. I've heard of like wine wineries who have normal wineries who make a non alk wine, and that's where all the money's coming from now.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Can I just laugh a little bit about White Claw alcohol free? I mean, isn't that soda water in LaCroix?
Speaker 3:That's what I thought. And then I literally, like, earlier this morning, saw someone reviewing it and saying that they thought it tasted like White Claw and they loved it and they were so grateful for it. I, you know, when I tried it, I thought it was like a seltzer. There's no adaptogens in it. I think if they had just infused a few adaptogens in there, they could have, you know, totally ran with it.
Speaker 3:But, you know, if you wanna be if you wanna feel part of, like, part of your crew, and they're all drinking White Claws. Right? You don't want to feel like the lone person out drinking something else. Having that zero proof option that looks just like everyone else's might taste different, but not too different, right? Like, it helps with the inclusivity.
Speaker 3:So,
Speaker 2:yeah, that makes total sense, but I still have to laugh at my first reaction. Was like, that has to be the dumbest thing I've ever seen. So, yeah. So I actually, this has been such an amazing episode, but I think a good place to talk about before we go are if somebody wants to get involved with community, if they want to find maybe a local bar that's doing new things or alcohol free shop or groups and events. Do you have like good starting points for those or any advice?
Speaker 3:If you're looking for something to do in your community and you're looking for a bar or a bottle shop, actually my friend Laura Silverman has a company called Zero Proof Nation. And if you go to Zero Proof Nation, you can enter your zip code or where you are and see what offerings are around you. So she has like an interactive map that you can use. So totally go there. And, yes.
Speaker 3:And then also go on Instagram. Go on social media because right now, like, that is biggest way that any company is marketing themselves. Right? It's on social media. So see what's in your area, you know, and if there's nothing happening, maybe that's your sign that you should be trying to fill that hole, right?
Speaker 3:I mean, this is such a booming market and industry, and there's so much room for everybody. And it's only gonna grow more.
Speaker 2:Yeah, if that's not good advice, if you don't find what you're looking for, go build it. Sounds like you're on that quest right now.
Speaker 3:Definitely. Yeah. And it's constantly evolving and changing. Right? So, you know, a big place that a lot of, you know, that has a lot of room for growth is these menus, restaurant menus, right?
Speaker 3:They need help building out their non alg offering. And so, you know, that's something I've been working on too. Like, I can walk outside my door and go into a million different restaurants and work with brands to bring samples and try to help bridge that gap, right, between what do we see when we go out to restaurants and what are the actual things that we can drink.
Speaker 2:Have you met Derek Brown?
Speaker 3:Yeah. Yeah. Went to the mindful I was at the convention in January. I was actually the stage host. So I was introducing everybody, and he's great.
Speaker 3:He's so great.
Speaker 2:Yeah. He's so much fun. If anybody is listening and hasn't watched that episode, go look it up.
Speaker 3:Yeah, he's doing some really big things in this space. I mean, the convention he put the mindful drinking fest is what I was looking for. I mean, it was incredible. It was like multiple days of discussions and panels and all of these beverage companies had tables. And if only I could show you this wall to my side, it literally I have like these bookshelves filled with non alcoholic beverages.
Speaker 3:Like I could open a store out of my one bedroom apartment. And it's kind of crazy. But there's just so many options these days. Like, it's, you know, even five years ago, there were just like, I don't know, a handful of kind of meh, non alga options. And now it's like every day there's like million new ones, and they all taste good and all, but a lot of them taste very good.
Speaker 3:And, you know, it's just, it's incredible.
Speaker 2:Yeah. No, I mean, it's definitely changing and it's changing fast. So before we go, I want you to tell us if somebody wants to learn more about soft bar, you could totally plug it because not as a thank you, but I think people are genuinely interested. I know I am. So talk a little bit about that before we go or any information, because I want to know.
Speaker 3:Okay, so soft bar is just honestly, it's all about creating an inclusive environment where people can come together and learn and be mindful and drink elevated delicious beverages and just feel seen and feel, you know, included in this, you know, social, the socializing, like, honestly, it's not an experiment. It's just like a new third place where people to come and hang out and feel at peace and feel good about their choices and about who they're talking to and what they're doing and not feel pressure to drink. It has nothing to do with alcohol. Right? And we're not trying to just appeal to sober people or, you know, it could be it's anybody who maybe just wants to take a night and be healthy and try something new and try something delicious that is good for you.
Speaker 3:That's really like, you know, soft bar is just like a new it's a new game. It's like this new genre that we're trying to create and and show people that this is a possibility and this exists, and you don't you don't need alcohol to have fun and feel good.
Speaker 2:Well, and mention it's incredible. And mention who the you're working with somebody that works with Bravo TV. Correct?
Speaker 3:So, yeah, I'm working with Carl Radke. He's on the show Summerhouse, and he got sober on the show and, you know, really shared a lot of his journey. And, you know, we met, like, it at an event, like, a year and a half ago and got connected. I was actually sitting next to him when he first said on TV he wanted to open a sober bar. I was, like, sitting down the bar from him, and it was I didn't think I would actually be on the team or we'd actually be doing it, but here we are.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, we've been working really, really hard on this project. We have a bunch of other really amazing people on the team, And, you know, I just feel really grateful and fortunate to get to work with him on this. And we have definitely have a shared dream that we're bringing to reality. So it's incredible. And I feel so grateful and lucky to be on this project.
Speaker 2:Well, I'm definitely rooting for you guys. So if anybody is listening and wants to connect with you, where's the best place that they can find you?
Speaker 3:Sober in Central Park on Instagram. Come see what it's all about. And yeah, and follow Softbar too, if that's something that, you know, you wanna see how how it goes and how we grow. And, you know, if you're in the city in 2025, come check us out. And, so many exciting things happening in the industry, and I'm just I'm super grateful to be part of it.
Speaker 2:Well, thank you for coming on. I had a lot of fun. I know that people got a lot of value from hearing your story and what you're up to and your insights on where things are going. So thanks so much for coming, Rachel.
Speaker 3:Thanks so much for having me. This was great.
Speaker 2:Thanks for listening to Journey to the Sunnyside. And if you enjoyed this episode, the best way you can show your support is by going on whatever platform you're listening on and giving us an honest review. This is gonna help others find us. And to be honest, it would mean the world to me. So if you can do that for me, I'd appreciate it.
Speaker 2:And thanks again for listening. This
Speaker 1:podcast is brought to you by Sunnyside, the number one alcohol moderation platform, having helped hundreds of thousands of people cut out more than 13,000,000 drinks since 2020. And in fact, an independent study showed that Sunnyside reduced alcohol consumption by an average of 30% in ninety days. And as one of our members shared, Sunnyside helps me stay mindful of my drinking habits. It's not super restrictive, so if I'm craving a glass of wine with dinner, I just track it and I move on with my week. If you could benefit from drinking a bit less and being more mindful of when and how much you drink, head on over to sunnyside.co to get a free fifteen day trial.
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